Sossity Chiricuzio

 

Outlaw linguistics

 

Feminine thinks I belong to them, but I’m not doing it right. Femme seeks to set me free, and knows however I do it is my right way. Feminine is a cog in the system, cut to fit, the slot for the tab. Femme is the wrench in the gears, the dismantling of locks into adornment and armor.

 

Feminine is to Femme as a neon light is to the aurora borealis. Which is to say, a created sense of garish meant as job security, rather than the natural wonder of the world showing off entirely for their own pleasure. Which is to oversimplify everything, in the pursuit of explaining one thing.

 

Feminine is has been will be was always divine. The familiar and the mysterious. The object of desire, but no, we keep telling you, not object. Subject. Not meant to be a reflection of the will and the rules and the force of masculine. Femme rejects biological imperative and capitalistic agendas.

 

Feminine is to phrase as Femme is to verb. The improper noun and an independent clause. Femme diagrams the sentence, turns it into a dress pattern, turns that into a paper airplane, flies it around the world, turns it back into a sentence, and ends in a defiant ellipsis.

 

Femme is very inclusive, but not of everybody. Femme is a gender. Femme is not found in breasts or cunts or high heels or pantyhose or conventional gender markers or endless youth or homogeneous beauty. Femme is not found at all, it is created. Femme is an art form.

 

Femme is the vessel of clay, shaped between palms seeking to love under pressure, burnished into being through testing flames and chemical reactions, bearing up through feasts and fear and famines and fury. Chipped and seamed and run through with precious metals and shoplifted glue.

 

Femme is not for the taking. Not the bodies, not the word. Femme is to feminine like essay question is to multiple choice. Like all you can eat is to calorie counting. Like the big box of crayons is to a piece of chalk. You can create beauty with that chalk, but in limited ways.

 

Femme is tools for dismantling, down to the bones, and fibers for building back up again. Each piece considered, chosen, or discarded. Building a new framework to hang a life upon. To weave through with community and connection, with art and activism, with the treasure that is self.

 

Feminine can be has been will become many of these things. Can challenge and change and choose. Can be the verb and the subject and the art form. Feminine can make of itself something like Femme, but if it is not queer, or if it is not trans, it is not Femme. It is some other beautiful thing.

 

 

 

Of moonlight and roses and mammals

 

brow furrowed

you delve inside me

for stories of coral

and kelp

the slippery grasp

of forever

 

of your own

desire, deep

set and hard

thrusting tectonic

quaking, but

I’m not talking

about science

 

I am sweat wet

mammal

climbing your arm

 

I am howling

your face is the moon

your face         is the moon

 

your smile a burst of stars

through the thin skin

of my eyelids

hot washed and

half mast

seeking you

 

a watery moon

an ocean

I open to

 

my cunt grown

to the size of

your heart

 

I am a drum ba

drum brum brum come

come coming

 

again words like:

vibration

yowl

salt

 

wet meat         wide open

 

you stroll you skip you jog you run

you pause        you pause

you dash in lead boots then slow

 

my cunt is a cave

a grove around that cave

the sky above that grove

 

my cunt is home

 

your hands are the wind

late night lock picking

breezes

 

rustling my shades

to rolling, over

slapping sounds

and flashes of

streetlight

wide open

 

and again, metaphor

when what I mean is

fucking

 

what I mean is

on your arm

I am a bouquet

of thorny rose

I am storm cloud

whistle and whirl

I am sobbing

your name

 


Sossity Chiricuzio is a queer femme outlaw poet, a working class crip storyteller. What her friends parents often referred to as a bad influence, and possibly still do. A 2015 Lambda Fellow, she writes as activism, connection, and survival, and is found in places like Adrienne, NANO fiction, and Lunch Ticket. visit sossitywrites.com.

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