Erica Holmes

[Non-Fiction]  “Life of an Ophelian Girl”

 

From “The Ophelia”, tvtrope.com:

 

“In real life, mental illness is rarely pretty, but in fiction, there’s just something about a lovely young woman…running around babbling lyrically about the strange visions flashing through her deranged mind, singing creepy little rhymes, scattering flowers, and occasionally bashing people’s heads in.”

 

9/9/18

CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITH MEDICATION: 247

MEDICATIONS TAKEN: Oxcarbazepine (1200 mg), Vyvanse (50 mg), Aripiprazole (25 mg), Zoloft (10 mg)

RECORDED SIDE EFFECTS: Little to none.

NOTES: I broke up with Nate today. Feel pretty shitty, especially after what he said. Feel like I should talk to Dr. Sloan about it.

 

9/15/18

CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITH MEDICATION: 253

MEDICATIONS TAKEN: Oxcarbazepine (1200 mg), Aripiprazole (25 mg), Zoloft (10 mg)

SIDE EFFECTS: Little to none.

NOTES: I feel so tired of being numb. Maybe it’s the meds, I should quit taking them. Yeah. I’m done.

 

A DIGRESSION IN DRUG FACTS:

Oxcarbazepine Important Information

Oxcarbazepine is an anticonvulsant. It works by decreasing nerve impulses that cause seizures and pain. It can also stabilize mood.

Side effects include dizziness, drowsiness, double vision.

Stay alert to changes in your mood or symptoms.

DO NOT STOP TAKING OXCARBAZEPINE SUDDENLY, AS SYMPTOMS MAY WORSEN.

 

Lisdexamfetamine Important Information

Lisdexamfetamine is a central nervous system stimulant. It is used to treat attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

Side effects may include dry mouth, loss of appetite, weight loss.

ASK YOUR DOCTOR BEFORE MAKING ANY CHANGES IN HOW OR WHEN YOU TAKE YOUR MEDICATIONS.

 

Aripiprazole Important Information

Aripiprazole is an antipsychotic medication used to treat bipolar disorder.

Side effects may include blurred vision, nausea, weight gain.

REPORT ANY NEW OR WORSENING SYMPTOMS TO YOUR DOCTOR.  DO NOT STOP TAKING ARIPIPRAZOLE SUDDENLY.

 

Sertraline Important Information

Sertraline is an antidepressant in a group of drugs called selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). Sertraline is used to treat depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, and several others.

Side effects may include sleep problems, impotence, loss of appetite.

DO NOT START OR STOP TAKING THIS MEDICATION WITHOUT YOUR DOCTOR’S ADVICE.

 

(But what do they know anyway?)

END DIGRESSION

 

10/7/18

CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITHOUT MEDICATION: 21

MEDICATIONS TAKEN: None!

RECORDED SIDE EFFECTS: Can’t have side effects with no meds!

NOTES: I feel so alive! Why did I ever let those b#$@es put me on that shit, I was so stupid, but it’s cool because now I can start living again maybe go drinking have some fun man all the possibilities are endless because I’m young and free finally from all of it.

 

10/16/18

CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITHOUT MEDICATION: 30

MEDICATIONS TAKEN: none

RECORDED SIDE EFFECTS: not noticed any

NOTES: I feel numb and empty I just want this to be over should I get back on them?

 

No.

 

10/24/18

CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITHOUT MEDICATION: 38

MEDICATIONS TAKEN: HELL NO

RECORDED SIDE EFFECTS: F*%K YOU

NOTES: GOING OUT TONIGHT FEEL GREAT GONNA HAVE THE TIME OF MY F%*#ING LIFE HIT UP THIS PARTY IT’LL BE LIT WHO NEEDS THEM DOCTORS DON’T KNOW S%*T ANYWAY ILL BE FINEGREATFANTASTIC I’M ALIVE

 

A SIDE NOTE IN STD TESTS

SSM Walgreens Health Clinic

Person Being Tested: [redacted]

Date: 10/27/18

Laboratory Sample Collected 10/27/18, Processed 10/27/18

Test Value Result
HIV EARLY DETECTION not detected NEGATIVE
HIV non-reactive NEGATIVE
Herpes Simplex 1 <0.90 NEGATIVE
Herpes Simplex 2 <0.90 NEGATIVE
Chlamydia not detected NEGATIVE
Gonorrhea not detected NEGATIVE
Syphilis non-reactive NEGATIVE
Hep B non-reactive NEGATIVE
Hep C non-reactive NEGATIVE

 

(Ok. Time to stop doing this.)

END SIDE NOTE

 

11/3/18

CONSECUTIVE DAYS WITH MEDICATION: 5

MEDICATIONS TAKEN: Oxcarbazepine (1200 mg), Vyvanse (50 mg), Aripiprazole (25 mg), Zoloft (10 mg)

RECORDED SIDE EFFECTS: Drowsiness, tremors in hands, decreased appetite, constipation

NOTES: Back on my medication. I forgot how numb I feel on it. All my mania drained away, replaced by apathy. Maybe that’s why I feel so sick. Maybe I should quit taking them…

  

  

  

Works Cited:

  • “Abilify (Aripiprazole) Patient Information: Side Effects and Drug Images at RxList.” RxList, www.rxlist.com/abilify-drug/patient-images-side-effects.htm#info.
  • “STI Testing & Treatment | Schedule Appointment.” Walgreens: Trusted since 1901., www.walgreens.com/topic/scheduler/sti-testing.jsp.
  • “The Ophelia.” TV Tropes, tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheOphelia.
  • “Trileptal (Oxcarbazepine) Patient Information: Side Effects and Drug Images at RxList.” RxList, www.rxlist.com/trileptal-drug/patient-images-side-effects.htm#info.
  • “Vyvanse (Lisdexamfetamine Dimesylate) Patient Information: Side Effects and Drug Images at RxList.” RxList, www.rxlist.com/vyvanse-drug/patient-images-side-effects.htm#info.
  • “Zoloft (Sertraline Hcl) Patient Information: Side Effects and Drug Images at RxList.” RxList, www.rxlist.com/zoloft-drug/patient-images-side-effects.htm#info.

  


Erica Holmes is a queer atheist attending Lindenwood University, working on her English Literature degree. She hopes to gain a Masters in Library Science and rule the library world. She writes if she gets angry enough, or if it’s a Tuesday, or if she can manage to find a good pen. For inquiries, contact her at e.g.holmes1@gmail.com.

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